Thursday, March 17, 2011

Conscience Sedation Sucks

Reasons why the Dentist’s Office is awkward:

-          When you have to have your face frozen to have a filling or worse. Not only is it painful, having the needle stick into your cheek and gums, but it gives you that super awkward smile after where it looks like half you face is dead.  And no matter how hard you try that part of your lip just won’t move. Your lips get all dried out and you attempt to put lip chap on and you can’t even rub your lips together.
-          The dentist has their fingers all up in your mouth. Like every time you try and swallow your mouth closes a little and then I feel all guilty for closing it more every time, they must think we’re trying to bite them or something.
-          The really awkward waiting period from when they freeze you and when the start working. You’re just lying there feeling your face freeze and numb while listening to the hygienists and dentists talk about TV shows their communally watch and make their funny dental humor.
-          Watching the TV’s in the ceiling. I’ve got the headphones on, but I can still hear what the dentists are saying and it’s like listening to two conversations and I get really confused as to which one to listen to. Half the time their arms and heads get in the way so you can’t even see the TV, or the tools get too loud that you can’t hear the TV, so you’re awkwardly lying there looking up the dentist’s nose.

All these things make the dentist a terrible experience. And they bring back the memory of my wisdom teeth extraction. I didn’t get sedated like most people do. I did it at my dentist’s office, where I was awake. They had me come in early for something called “conscience sedation”. I came in half an hour early to take a pill that would calm me but not knock me out. It’s affect on me was completely opposite. I took it and when they brought me back to sit in the chairs I started freaking out. They began freezing my mouth, again a painful procedure, feeling the chemicals spreading through your face, but they didn't do my upper lip, and man they pinched that a lot! After I became numb and they put those tinted safety glasses on me and were getting ready to put the dam thing in, I burst into tears because I’m had become so tense and was freaking out that I was going to die or something. The dentist was afraid to work on me, kept saying things like “We can do this another time”. I was barely audible when I finally burst out “Just do it!” And we proceeded, in a very embarrassing procedure. It was the most painful experience in my mouth ever. It makes your entire head hurt and I’m glad we only have to do it once in our lives. I ended up getting sick from the Tylenol 3’s they give you and got an infection. So the moral of the story is, don’t do drugs at the dentist, you may end up like this:

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